Updated Daily!
Saturday April 27 2024
World Famous!
2524 Copies Sold!
Pikey’s Page
featuring the one and only
“Steampunk Pikey”
the World Famous, Twenty-Three Pound, High-Falutin’ Ragdoll Cat!
A young Pikey, head cocked and already questioning authority!
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A frank discussion about the origins and implications of naming a cat “Pikey” taken from the Johnny Robish’s Fireside Chats.
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OK, I’ll admit it – I’m a little pissed. Pikey just got back from the vet where he had some minor surgery – and the bastards gave him this. For minor surgery! Hell, I had a full colonoscopy about six months ago and no one offered me squat. Not even a stick of gum or a lousy piece of hard candy.Now you tell me, where’s the justice here?
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Here’s Pikey at the vet the other day – in for a blood test and some x-rays. The vet says the x-rays show one of Pikey’s kidneys is way smaller than the other, so if I ever notice he’s been drinking excessively, it could mean serious trouble. Pikey drinking excessively? So, on top of everything else, I’m now supposed to check around the house every day to see if Pikey may be hiding those miniature bottles of Jack
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For all you yoga aficionados, here’s master yogi Pikewan Di – doing the famed feline yoga move “upward facing cat!”
This is for all of you who complain that Pikey does nothing but sleep, here he is, hard at work – doing a job many Americans refuse to do.
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So – (as seen below) – here I am lying on my bed, taking a well deserved nap after returning from a hard gym workout, when out of nowhere, this gigantic 23-pound blue-eyed monster pounces on my chest and demands to discuss the topic of “kitty treats.” Well I informed him in no uncertain terms that in “polite society,” one doesn’t wake others out of a deep slumber to discuss abstract, esoteric subjects like “kitty treats. The audacity of these beasts! Is it any wonder Western Civilization is crumbling before our very eyes?
The above is a photograph is of Pikey while being arrested for “Grand Theft Ragdoll.” Arresting officers stated he exhibited a “furrier than thou” demeanor.
The driver’s license Pikey presented to the arresting officer.
Pikey, the world’s foremost handshaking pussycat! I’m getting a lot of mail with people who believe that a cat who shakes hands is no big deal, pointing out that you can even train politicians to do that.
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Good grief! Came home to find Pikey sitting in my chair. I said “Pikey, what the hell are you doing on up on the furniture?” He told me “calm down, I got a permit.”
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Here’s a picture of yet another off-shore investment I discovered Pikey made. Apparently, he bought a bar this time. If you ask me, its a sad day when they’re allowing cat’s to get liquior licenses. How the hell is a cat gonna check ID’s to spot for underage drinkers?
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I suspected Pikey was misbehaving while I’m not at home, so I had a “tail” put on him.
Pikey lists his hobbies as sleeping and chewing on plastic.
Had to do some shopping, so I told Pikey as I was leaving the house to try and get some sleep while I’m gone.
I’m booking a flight to Los Angeles and flying Pikey with me. When I went to book the cat, the first thing they asked me was “does he have a pug nose?” Now I know we’re flying into “La La Land,” but are you telling me my cat may have to get a nose job before they’ll let him into LA?
I posted a new picture of my cat Pikey here on my website and almost everyone thought he looked really cute except for Mel Gibson who said he looked like a Vegas whore.
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Pikey caught in the act. Johnny holding up “Exhibit A” for the court to examine. The judge labeled Pikey “23 pounds of pure discontent and rebellion against the rule of law” (please note: the term “pounds” is not meant as a reference to British currency in this instance).
Can’t say that friends didn’t caution me that when you name a cat Pikey, you’re just asking for trouble.
Came home one night and caught big 23-pound Pikey watching Fox News. I thought, what a shock, my cat’s a Republican? Then when I thought about it, it all made sense. With the Democrats always complaining about how much they’re against the fat cats, how else is he gonna vote?
I don’t really have anything very fancy in my apartment, so I usually let my cat climb up on the furniture if he wants. A neighbor noticed this and reported it to Animal Control who cited me for contributing to the delinquency of a mongrel.
I was living on the island in Kauai, but Pikey insisted I move to Maui because he speaks Meowaui.
I occasionally get mail from people asking me to remove the Pikey Page from the website because they hate cats. The truth be known, I don’t like cats either, I just raise them for their meat.
Pikey is a card-carrying member of the National Association of Pussycats, also known as “NAP.”
Say what?
Is life really supposed to be this hard?
Anyone see something move?
Its all in a day’s work folks!
Pikey, liv’n the life while in Maui
Just what part of meow don’t you understand pal?
Ragdoll’s Rule!!!
by Johnny Robish
© Copyright 2017
by Johnny Robish © Copyright 2024
I just love Pikey. Looking fwd to seeing some new photos. Pikey, I really like your human, too. His site is in-site-ful. Also funny. Pikey, you’ve done an excellent job training him. Plus, he loves pussycats!
Why thank you so much. I’ll pass the word on to the Pike monster. And I’ll try and put up some new pics soon my friend.
I wish there were more pics and videos! 🙁 i love pikey <333
Thanks for your nice comments. Pikey is quite the kitty. I’ll try and post more of his stuff in the near future.
One very cool cat!
Hey, thanks my friend!
Pikey is awesome. Love that pic of him all stretched out. “Grand theft ragdoll” har har!
Thank you Julie! Pikey is the best Kitty in the US, but he does have a furrier that thou attitude (lol).